Letters from the Outside, In, KK to Swango, #11

Michael:

Wow! Two letters in one day. Today I trudged to Williamsburg, Brooklyn. Are you familiar with this area? Wmsburg. is a place I hate. It is a very artsy part of Brooklyn where all the annoying hipsters live. If you like trust fund, unwashed-haired kids from the Midwest with tattoos and no sense of purpose, well, then, Billysburg is for you. I went there to pick up money from a store that I sell jewelry I design at. (That sentence is grammatically wrong, btw. I’m just too lazy to fix it.) I don’t think I’ve mentioned that I make jewelry. It’s pretty interesting and certainly doesn’t earn much money but a few hundred here and there helps keep me in movies and books. I will paste in the tags I attach to all my pieces:
Anyway, it was very cold and pouring out today so I made the trek there and was surprised I was owed more than anticipated. I also took some of my clothes to a consignment shop in that area. They buy used designer or vintage pieces. They selected a few pieces and used the credit to buy a vintage leather motorcycle jacket. You know, cause I was ‘born to be wild’ and all. I hope you can hear the sarcasm.

I have so much work to do and it is already 8:08pm. I’m waiting for In Treatment, starring Gabriel Byrne, to come on. Oddly, you mentioned it in your letter. It is an ok show, but it makes me tense. The people who see him with their problems stress me out. They all annoy me.

Back to your letter. Let me try to answer the questions posed.

I have thought of creating a book of my blog entries, but honestly, if I were to write a book, I’d probably write a memoir. I have had a very weird and interesting life. I haven’t mentioned much of it here and may or may not in the future, but suffice it to say I have had many wacky things happen to me. I feel trapped in a Seinfeldian Hell.

I hated the movie FUR, but loved the book about Arbus. Yes, it was the Bosworth bio I read. She was a visual genius for sure. Her photos were very harsh and almost scary. She went places such as nudist colonies, carnivals, drug dens, etc. to capture the essence of “freaks.” Yes, a friend calls me the literary Diane Arbus. I know you have only read my goofy dating columns and upbeat blog entries, but I am a very dark person. I know the pain of life and enjoy writing about it. Diane was obviously creative and a depressive. I guess that is why he compares us.

The Guggenheim and Museum of Nat. History parties I referenced were not private invite only. The Guggenheim has an event every first Friday of the month where they open the museum from 9-1am, have a dj, drinks and allow people to drunkenly roam the circles of art. I also belong to an art membership organization called GENART which allows members to go to private art showings, film screenings, concerts and fashion shows. Coincidentally I just won 2 free tickets to go see the new documentary by James Toback about Mike Tyson, aptly called, “Tyson.” I am a big fan of boxing. I used to date an executive producer at SHOWTIME who would get me into big boxing events. I got to sit next to Don King once, ringside, in Atlantic City. I also flew to Vegas for a big Holyfield fight. It is a beautiful, albeit gory, sport.

I’m now onto Letter 2 from Swango: No migraine today, thankfully.
As for dachshunds, I did not have one growing up. I had a very odd childhood that is too long to get into. I have just always liked them because they are funny looking, silly and have very dominant personalities. I like that they have attitude. Mine is snoring on a chair behind me.

I didn’t notice any of those bookstores in India, however, I know exactly what you are talking about. I was on a small island once, Caye Caulker, off the coast of Belize—no cars at all b/c it is just 3 miles. However, there was a book café where you could leave a book and take a book. Likewise when I was in Venezuela this summer there was also something similar. I, did, however, leave a ton of books in the apt. I rented in India. I like leaving bits of “myself” and my things in places I travel. I wonder who gets them next…

Paul Janka is guy who graduated from Yale. He is a weird guy. Model good looks and very smart, but crazy. He wrote a manifesto about how to get laid in NY without spending a dime. It wasn’t really even tongue-in-cheek. It was serious and mean. I actually became ‘friends’ with him and went on a mock-date so I could write
about it. I did so online, contending that he has a severe compulsion disorder. It is sad. He has since been on Dr. Phil and has a show in the works for MTV. He also was accused of trying to sexually assault a girl he was on a date with. SCARY! I run into him sometimes in the subway. He is an odd character, but has always been nice to me. He is not-so-affectionately known in internet circles as “the worst man in the world.”

I just watched the latest ALICE episode. It is about a 26 year old Brazilian girl, Alice, who lives in a coastal town in Brazil called Las Palmas. Her father commits suicide and she goes to Sao Paolo for his funeral. She meets her step-sister there and her lesbian aunt. She has a fiancé in Las Palmas. She misses her flight b/c she is partying and decides to stay in Sao Paolo. She doesn’t explain to the boyfriend and sort of begins a new life there in Sao Paolo. That’s the gist of it. The City plays a central character role; I like seeing Brazil.

I will try to find the Post article about my firing online. I have searched for it and can’t seem to get a full article, but I believe it is linked up on my Wikipedia page. I will try to find it and print it out for you. I no longer do any reporting for GMTV. I was only filling in for a reporter over the holidays. It was so fun! Have you been to England? I have only been to London, and I loved it. I always say I’d never live anywhere but NYC, but if I absolutely had to go elsewhere, it’d be London.

Ah, so you’ve seen your Wikipedia listing. Ok. So I Googled you today. OMG! It didn’t say much I didn’t know—many poisonings, murders and subsequent jail time. However, the thing that floored me is that it mentions you dated someone you called “KK.” It says her name was Kristin Kinney and that you were engaged to her and that she was upset upon realizing you were being investigated and that you had done jail time. She left you to move back to where her family was and ended up killing herself. It also says she was found with arsenic in her and that her family suspected you may have given her it. Of course, my sincerest condolences go to you and her family. Suicide is always such a tragedy. I can’t even imagine how awful… However, “KK?” Really? You didn’t think to tell me this coincidence? It is pretty shocking that you had a KK that was very prominent in your life. And then I wrote to you, signing as I usually do, “KK.” What do you think about this? It is very unnerving.

I know you are probably squeamish about this whole thing, and it is not my intention to upset you, however, I’m very curious. Curious about KK. The poisonings… I also am interested in understanding how you feel about something. Online it says you are a sociopath. (I know the clinical definition and assume you do too.) Do you feel you are one? I’m not a doctor, clearly, so I have no idea. How do you feel about that word? Were you born without, or grew to have, no conscience? I’m not judging, just curious. Do you get pleasure out of others’ pain? Again, this is not me being critical—clearly I am absolutely opposed to any crime, including murder and do not condone any illegal actions---but I just want to try to understand.

I also see here that there was some sort of book written about you called BLIND EYE. Have you read this? Do you know of it? I’m assuming it would not be very flattering… Should I get a copy?

And last on this awkward topic, you cannot write about a “bad heart” and not explain. Come on, now. What exactly do you mean you had a bad heart? I assume you don’t mean physically as in heart problems. You say you no longer have a “bad heart.” After you define “bad heart” then what cured it?

You have children! I realize they are far away, but do they write to you? Do you know what they look like? Are you still friendly with their mothers? Also, what was your first wife like? I told you all about my annoying ex-husband, so it is your turn. Although I’m not suggesting your wife was annoying….

This letter is already 3 pages so I’ll save my blog entries for next time. I will send you another Outside the Box, I hopefully haven’t sent before and some more short blog entries.

I must get into bed now and watch In Treatment and stay up late reading the latest New York, New Yorker and Harpers. Tomorrow is a busy day. Hope all my questions haven’t irked you.

‘Night.

KK