Letters from the Inside, Justin Barber, #1

A while ago a repeat of a 48 Hours Mystery aired about a man who was walking on a secluded beach in FL with his wife and a mysterious gunman shot him four times and killed his wife. I found the guy really attractive, but they are saying he is sociopath who planned the whole thing, going so far as to research how to shoot yourself and not have any serious injuries. There is something in this guy's manner that reminds me so much of John. I had a friend and fellow ODer watch the show (It's available on Youtube in parts --and the transcript of the show is in writing on the 48 Hour Site) and she said it was really clear to her from the start he was lying.

Check them out and tell me what you think.

Anyway, I wrote to him and he has just responded.

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Hi Kelly,

I hope you're well and enjoying the new year. Thanks for writing. Mail call is one of the few bright spots of prison life. At least it is when you actually receive some mail. The holidays are difficult here, and your card was a pleasant surprise.

I haven't seen the 48 Hour Mystery episode you mentioned; nor have I read the transcripts of that show or any of the others. From what family and friends have told me, 48 Hours was probably the most balanced of all the shows. Which is to say that they only portrayed me as a monster for half the episode. Sensationalism drives television ratings and ratings drive ad revenue. But understanding the motives behind my villification doesn't comfort me at all. The unembellished truth (and seeing my deepest character flaws clearly) is difficult enough to come to terms with. I'm an adulturer and womanizer. Maybe a binge drinker. I'm insecure for all the wrong reasons, yet I'm also overconfident for all the wrong reasons. But I'm not a murderer. I'm not a sociopath. Being a self-centered jack-ass is bad enough--I can't take credit for anything more sensational than that. I will say that the 48 Hour production crew treated my family well, especially my grandparents, and I'm thankful for that.

Being a farm boy from Oklahoma, NYC has always fascinated me. Perhaps if you write again, you'll share some of the stories from your blog that depicts life in the City. do you find it difficult to sleep when so much is happening all the time? I'm also interested to know what particular Seinfeld episodes you have been trapped in. Cramer is my favorite character, of course. I'ts been years since I've seen a Seinfeld episode. "I'm out there, Jerry, and I'm loving every minute of it." Remember the one where Cramer goes commando? I have a friend who seems to relate every event in her life to a Seinfeld episode and your comment triggered a happy memory. Thanks.

Feel free to write again. You're much better company than that which I've grown accustomed to in recent years.

Justin