Letters from the Inside, Michael Swango, #121

My Dear Kelly,

Obviously given the significant delay inherent with written, mailed letters, events often supersede our comments and impassions :-) reflections. So as I beging this letter, two events are quickly approaching: the glitzy premiere of Amir's PBS film ; AND of course your 41st birthday: a dynamic, beautiful woman in the prime of her amazing life! I am not being facetious.

[BTW, you never commented on the rather interesting coincidence that you and Tina Fey were born only two days apart. At least I thought it was interesting...]
Your most recent letter downgraded the AK/KK "alert level" to "topsy turvy" .. as compared to Amir's fever dream email of a couple of weeks ago!
Tell Amir you and he need your very own color-coded relationship threat level!!! And my God-what an amazing reality show you two could star in!

OK, as mentioned above, received your letter and a postcard just before the weekend/much to discuss, so let me get right to it, along with the inevitable digressions.

No way you could know every rule of this most remarkable institution. I believe you that is not the policy elsewhere. Thanks for your continued understanding.

Given the enormous popularity and critical praise (richly deserved) of AMC's The Killing, I am sure that the original Danish series will become easily accessible and affordable quite soon.

Postcard: Richard Prince/He certainly has some evocative images in his head. Especially since the "Untitled" work is 7X9 feet.

[Ed.: Omitting TV commentary.]

>The single greatest cultural/entertainment advantage of living in your great city would have to be the theater. No other city anywhere, with the possible exception of London even comes close.

Great cast of The Motherfucker with the Hat. Curious how Chris Rock is on stage.

[Ed.: Omitting film discussion.]

***

Now to the Twilight Zone portion of your letter.

>John--I have to admit his trainwreck of a life is utterly bizarre. You cannot seem to get away from him, can you?

I could not help but think of the widely reported but false stories of the Haitian link to HIV/AIDS early on in the pandemic. And now John visits Haiti? Talk about a consequence-free zone for his "proclivities".

You mentioned previously and in this letter that the non-civil case is inactive barring any future incidents. Tell me again why his incidents with our female hero were not prosecuted? The cases in upstate NY were.

Anyway, your dilemma is heartening. When is the next date (deposition)? Did anything I saw help even a little bit? Feel free to ask other questions.

Is it just me or does it seem weird for you to have dinner with Reid and then watch Idol with him especially when he clearly has Kelly locked into his Brain Housing Group?

Oh KK, You must tell me next time Amir is scheduled for Eliot Spitzer or any other cable news show. I know, however, that those bookings are usually made only a day or even hours ahead of time.

And I'll say this: Between the C**T in Amir office and Reid, it seems like everyone has their opinion on your suitability for Amir and vice-versa. My God, FB has turned even NYC into a gossipy small town...Screw them.

Final note for now to your Amir:

Dude, you don't live on the street and you are not HERE. You do NOT cut your own hair. I am appalled. Listen to your Kelly, man!

The fictional story I suggested we write of the male and female sociopaths who become an unbreakable couple would be oh-so-dark and chilling. Imagine a novel where the normal-appearing suburban couple do not put their children's welfare above their own selfish and dual needs. Indeed, where the couple use their children for their ownneeds without a hint of conscience or remorse.

Proposed excerpt: "...The new neighbors? Oh yes, the Kirks, such a tragedy. They lost a child a few years ago in an accident with a crib. You might have read about the lawsuit and huge settlement..."

Michael